Creating Intimacy: Ways to Reconnect with Your Partner
Brittany Kurdewan, LMFT, works with individuals, couples, and families in our Center City office. Read on to learn her suggestions for reconnecting with your partner.
September is usually a month filled with life transitions. The season is changing; you’re preparing for the Fall; you’re getting into your work routine, and your children are heading back to school or even starting college. Let’s face it – life is constantly in motion! It is difficult balancing the kid’s schedules, work, a social life, and self-care; this often results in relationships and marriages being neglected.
With all of the commotion – Are you giving your relationship the attention it needs? If not, here are some suggestions on how to create intimacy in your relationship:
- Give daily compliments. Give your partner a little extra attention and love by giving compliments and positive thoughts to carry them through the day. What are you grateful for in your relationship? What do you find most attractive about your spouse? Actively tell your partner how you feel and how they make you feel.
- Schedule a date night. Time is scarce when balancing family and work. Make a commitment and set time aside in advance to have a night out – or a night at home! Go to your favorite restaurant or try a new one. Go see a movie or rent one at home. Take advantage of times when the kids are out for sleepovers or visiting relatives.
- Be affectionate. Give a hug or kiss in the morning before heading out, leave a note of endearment, or surprise them with their favorite treat when they get home from work.
- Challenge yourselves. Children are always a topic of conversation for parents. Challenge yourselves NOT to talk about your children while you are spending time connecting. How often does this happen? Instead, be present with your partner and focus on your relationship.
- Get to know each other better. Take the Love Languages quiz with your spouse!
Instead of completing the quiz individually, take turns asking each other the questions. Be curious of your partner’s answers, give examples of what you mean, and use this information when planning your next date or when doing something special!