It’s Just Marriage

October 25, 2014

We’re quickly arriving at a moment in time when we won’t be talking about “gay marriage” anymore because there won’t be a distinction between “gay marriage” and “marriage.” When the Supreme Court declined to take up the issue of same sex marriage last week the effect was to let stand state laws that will lead to more than 60% of the population living in states where people are free to marry regardless of their identified sexual orientation.

In the midst of all the legal, emotional and spiritual benefits of marriage that lesbian, gay, and bisexual couples will now access I’m also pondering other possible benefits of marriage equality. What will the impact be when we begin to experience marriage between same gendered people not as something unique or different but as just marriage?

Self compassion and acceptance of others are the foundations of the kinds of relationships that enrich our lives and help us feel connected. I’m breathing deeply into the joyful possibility that the Supreme Court’s inaction last week could be another step toward freeing us all to accept ourselves and one another as we are, and to live our lives with greater compassion.

Wanda Sevey, MDiv, LMFT is a staff therapist at Council for Relationships’ Center City and Voorhees, NJ offices. She is an ordained minister in the progressive United Church of Christ and is interested in helping clients of all (or no) religious and faith backgrounds explore the connections between their own spirituality, religion, sexuality and relationships. She can be reached at or (856) 783-4200 ext. 1